The word “forgiveness” came from the word to “give”. Forgiveness is a gift of healing and freedom. When you give it to another person who has hurt you, you actually are healing yourself and set yourself free.
Forgiveness is the key to happiness. Happiness is coming from a place of inner peace. You can’t have inner peace until you practice forgiveness both for yourself and for others.
In relationships, happier couples are more likely to forgive each other than those who aren’t so happy.
Forgiveness is about self-love. When we forgive ourselves, we instantly feel a delightful lightness that opens our heart and spreads all throughout our body. We can’t change the past but we can change how the past effects our present moment.
Like attracts like, when we are angry and feel resentful about how others hurt us, we’re focusing our energy on those negative emotions and feelings, and attracting more victim-like events into our life.
How do you forgive?
First step: finding the reasons for unforgiveness
- What is the emotion associated with unforgiveness? Most people find it difficult to forgive someone who has hurt them. The unforgiveness often causes you more anger if you are dwelling on it and allowing it to become chronic anger regardless the cause, which can bring you more emotional and physical stress.
- We are seeking justice. Even if you are not angry, but you believe that the person who offended you deserves punishment, you may hold onto it and become reluctant to let it go.
- The offender hasn’t apologized yet. An apology has to be recognized in order to open the door of forgiveness.
Second step: How to forgive others
- Forgive yourself: Accept the responsibility for your contribution. If you don’t forgive, you give others the power to ruin your daily life. You keep them in your mind, so you have no space to attract happiness into your life. The truth is that you cannot truly and completely forgive another until you have first forgiven yourself. Also, you set yourself free by forgiving yourself for what they did.
- Let go of the past: When you hold unforgiveness, you live in the past. If you don’t release the past, it is hard for you to move on and attract something better in the future. A simple way to release the past is to write a journal about your past stories along with your anger and hurts, and then burn it and declare loudly “I let it go!”
- Release negative emotions: When you are dwelling on those heavy feelings from the past, you feel drained and overwhelmed by those negative emotions and thoughts because they consume lots of energy. Even worse, you attract more negativity into your life. A fast way to help you detach from those negative emotions is to have a conversation with your emotions, for example, ask yourself a few questions: why do I feel hurt and what am I angry about? Pay attention to the messages you get and take the responsibility for the role you play in the story. Then you can release your emotions with visualization; watch them being released from your body like the smoke and moving far away in the sky and finally being absorbed into the clouds.The visualization process is going to help you detach from the negative emotions fast.
- Embrace compassion: You are forgiving the person for their fault. No one is perfect, we are all here to learn the lessons and grow spiritually. Compassion for others makes forgiveness much easier. Forgiveness is truly a blessing, you set yourself free and you attract peace and happiness in your life.
- Choose to forgive: In every moment, you have the opportunity to choose forgiveness and it is a constant process, which means you will always choose the feelings of happiness, love, freedom and choose to heal from the past.
How to instantly boost your happiness? Read The Happiness Project
What are your tips to create more happiness and love in your life? Please share with us.
“If we really want to love, we must learn how to forgive.” ~ Mother Theresa